Sigh

Just when I think I have successfully organized my brain into calculating the inner workings of income tax, banking, bill paying,and paperwork mazes, I am met again with another costly failure. I want to believe that I can aspire to these tasks, but distraction and the sleepiness that overtakes me negates my good intentions. I know I am somewhere else between the awake and sleeping. I wish it was like drifting away by a field of red poppies, traveling with a singing trio, who find my company fascinating. It is not, no kindly Tin man for me. Frustrating and annoying those around me, who say they wish they could sleep like me.

I must face the reality of my choppy brain. I also must somehow communicate this effectively, beyond the pleading, whining, and obvious errors. I need help with these sequential tasks, not explosive tirades about files and putting things away. Impatience is my enemy, waiting for help, repetitively asking for oversight, closing my ears to the terse responses, compels me to hastily do it myself. Maybe that is why my soul prefers to sleep, dreaming of kind witches, emerald cities and a wizard who will know the answer.